Der Tyrant’s Corner July 29th, 2011 AD

Darling 1^st & 4^thers,

I hope this finds you all well.

As we grow better faster stronger in our play of the sport of Subbuteo, it makes me think that we’re missing something. We have a club name, a motto, nicknames, pitches, players, balls, deciders, self-invented verbs, titles, trophies, a blog, movies, a line of fashionable sports wear and a lot of other crap; but we’re missing something that is so simple and yet so vital to a great finger soccer club… and it is the obvious, the club colors.

I hereby set out to correct this bit of oversight. Because I am some sort of fair or touched tyrant, I will open the color choice suggestion up to the members of the club… for one month. If I do not receive any suggestions on the club colors, I will choose them myself and lord it over all of you for the rest of your lives.

So, in keeping with other sporting team color traditions, you may choose a scheme involving up to two or three colors. Please be specific in your description of your team color suggestions. For instance, blue and white doesn’t cut it. We need to know exactly what kind of blue and what kind of white. For instance, I think the blue and white of the University of Kentucky basketball team makes me want to vomit, so if I’m in a bad mood and you suggest “blue and white”, then I’m going to assume you meant the University of Kentucky blue and white, vomit and delete your suggestion… and possibly remove you from my xmas card list as well… and maybe prank you by sending a pizza that you didn’t order to your house. So I caution you to be specific. Other examples which would be acceptable are: Blue like Taylor Swift’s eyes… if they’re blue and if I’m wrong why the hell would I be supposed to know something like that?... Chog poo brown… Yellow like Sasquatch’s teeth because his teeth are yellow and that is a complete and unalterable fact before god, science and country… etc.

My suggestion for our club colors:

Black hole hands black, white as bright as my impeccable soul and red (pantone 19-1763… google image it if you don’t know what I’m talking about).

You have until August 29^th to submit your ideas via comments to this blog, email (timwritesbooks@gmail.com) or the dreaded Facebook message. I will then list all our possible choices and we will vote, thus settling this matter by early September. Or maybe you’ll all slack off and I’ll decide what our club colors will be. Get crackin’.

Your lovely,

Der Tyrant